Last autumn my boyfriend went to Spain with his friends. Right after that two of my best friends went to Rome. I started to think. Everyone else was going abroad while I was sitting in home and just dreaming about travelling.
I needed a break from my life. I had just ended my long therapeutic relationship and I felt kinda out of place. I decided that it's time for me to try my wings. I just knew that I needed to get away from my home country and go somewhere no one knows me. I had to find myself.
So I started to look for a place to go. I spent many hours compering hostels, flights and countries. Finally I ended up to Amsterdam. I selected best days, booked a hostel and told everyone that I'm going. No one seemed to understand why I did it. Why now, why couldn't I wait half year and save some more money.
I knew that if I don't go now, I won't ever go.
Amsterdam was lovely. I stayed at Flying Pigs Downtown hostel and I met many new people. I bought Iamsterdam-card which includes public transport pass, discounts and free tickets to many places. I planned to visit almost in 20 museums, but I had time only about half of it. I visited Heineken Experience, House of Bols, Houseboat, NEMO, Madame Tussauds and many more. But I think that those museums weren't the thing what made my trip awesome. It was all those lovely people with me.
First night I met C. C was from USA. I spent all night with him and oh, I had so much fun! We talked, he showed me things like predicting from handwriting. It was so nice, but we never kept in touch. He left next morning, so we don't have anything else common. But still I sometimes miss him. He is my Facebook friend, but we don't talk to each other, we just don't have anything to say.
But later on that trip I met D and E. I met them in the bar where I didn't fit at all. That bar was nothing like bars here. Boys danced and they weren't trying to hit girls. Girls didn't have dresses, almost every girl had jeans and t-shirts. It was so strange because I have got used to that every girl wear dress in bar. And if they aren't wearing dress, they have had some effort. They have beautiful shirts, not regular shirts, strong make-up and high heels. It was so strange to be only woman there, who had dress. And there was so many boys. I think that almost 80% were boys. It was really strange.
But luckily I met D and E. I talked with them, drank and changed numbers. Next they came to museums with me. I can't believe that I actually made two boys come to bag and purse museum. But they did it. They really came with me. They spent all day with me. They took me their favorite bar where we played pool and drank Jägermeister shots. Those shots were the cheapest in Amsterdam. I have to admit that I had worst hungover in my life. It lasted like 4 days, DAYS! And yea, I had flight to home next day. It was pretty interesting trip.
I miss D and E. They were awesome. I hope that I can go and visit them someday. I'll definitely go back there someday, but I don't have money or time to go there right now. I have too many trips to make before that. Luckily we still talk to each other. Not that often, but at least a little bit. It's all that matters.
That trip changed everything. I realized that I love travelling alone. I like that feeling when I can make all the decisions. I'm really bad making decisions and I figured that out in Amsterdam.Before that I haven't ever noticed it. I haven't ever done anything alone. It took like 2 hours to decide what I wanna eat. I just walked around the city and tried to choose restaurant for me. But it was only good for me. I needed to realize that. It's my weak point and I have to work with it.
Anyway. That trip reminded me about my dreams. About that how good it can feel, when you are truly yourself. It's so much easier to remember that when you're not home. I feel more home abroad, no matter where. It feels like my heart is there, waiting me to come.
Those 5 days where more than just 5 days. They showed my path.
Love,
Ambivalent
No comments:
Post a Comment